Saturday, February 27, 2016

Aaron's Party

Who knew that Aaron Carter

the former party-pop sensation
and younger brother

of former Backstreet Boy
Nick Carter

even with his equal parts-military cadence
and pep rally-style
hit from 2002

called "America A O"

(which actually includes
in un-Trumpian fashion

"half black
white
Spanish"

and "Chinese"

in the list of people
to whom he requests
"show me what you got"

in the friendliest sense)

would tweet his support
for Donald Trump

and thereby indicate his approval

of the "Our parents
made us do this"

freelance "Freedom Kids"

rather than Bernie Sanders

who has no official mascots

but fans who make
catchy and moving music videos

which actually articulate
his intended policy goals

and continuously spoken and lived values?

Carter has since
had to defend his endorsement

in a continuous stream of tweets

telling fans he believed
Trump would support gay rights

but would not vote for him
if he didn't.

That may be an optimistic view
of the candidate

whose response to his endorsement
by former Grand Wizard
of the Ku Klux Klan

Dr. David Duke

was "I disavow it.

Okay?"


This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Savaging the Status Quo

In a guest post for SCOTUSblog

President Obama
has described his criteria

for nominating the next
Supreme Court justice.

His ideal candidate
would have "a sterling record"

"a deep respect
for the judiciary role"

and "an understanding of the way
the world really works."

Even staunch Obama-haters
would do well to consider
whether Sarah Palin

to whom it would be only fair
if Donald Trump gave
some political office

(if not the Vice Presidency)

in return for her skilled campaigning
on his behalf

would be the best person
for this role.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Sunday, February 21, 2016

The Right to Fall

We say goodbye to you
Jeb Bush

as you exit
the presidential race.

Though no one
with a memory
of a not-so-distant past

has been clamoring
for another Bush
in the White House

this poet occasionally
did feel sorry
for Mr. "Low Energy"

if only because
Donald Trump's making fun of him

brought him the tiniest bit
more in touch

with every other demographic.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Thursday, February 18, 2016

The Antipope

When Pope Francis says
that Donald Trump

as "a person who thinks only
about building walls

wherever they may be
and not building bridges"

is therefore "not Christian”

the obvious response for Trump

is clearly neither
keeping his mouth shut

nor even claiming
that his border wall

is in fact
a border wall of love

but instead saying
in a speech in South Carolina

"For a religious leader
to question a person's faith
is disgraceful"

and adding

"The Mexican government fed the pope
a tremendous amount of stuff

about 'Trump is not
a good person'.

Can you imagine that?"

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Monday, February 15, 2016

Stupidity Regarded as Wisdom

Justice Antonin Scalia
who was found dead Saturday
at a Texas ranch

at the age of 79
and who had chronic health problems

was no doubt murdered via heart attack
given by a president
who wants to fill his seat

to create a now Democrat-majority court
who will kowtow
to his socialist agenda

and who himself continues to receive
both emailed and tweeted death threats

according to Republican conspiracy theorists

also known as Fox News'
primary source of information.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Friday, February 12, 2016

Cut Along the Bias

In a new gender-blind study

a six-person team
of computer science researchers

looked at three million contributions
or "pull requests"

on the repository website GitHub

and found
that when the gender
of a contributor was unknown

a woman's code
was accepted 78.6 percent
of the time

while a man's
was accepted only 74.6 percent
of the time

though women
were more likely
to have their code rejected

when gender was revealed.

Though the results
have not yet been peer-reviewed

what might they indicate

about male politicians
Ted Cruz and Donald Trump

debating which of them
is more pro-restricting abortion rights

and simultaneously
more pro-woman
than the other?

Probably nothing.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Just Bee-ing Herself

Samantha Bee
a former correspondent
for Jon Stewart

on "The Daily Show"

last night premiered
her weekly show "Full Frontal" on TBS.

With her debut
she has become

the first woman 
on American television

to host a late-night show

taking witty aim
at both Hillary Clinton's
and Bernie Sanders'

(as it is true
that despite their respective merits
they are still politicians)

claims to authenticity.

But as the ultimate test

of her inheritance
to the hosting throne

this poet proposes
that her next topic

be comparing Bernie Sanders
and his vocal condemnation
of sexist "Bernie Bros"

to Donald Trump
and his endorsement through repetition

of a New Hampshire voter's assessment
of Ted Cruz

as a certain part

of female anatomy.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Saturday, February 6, 2016

Real Talk

Bernie Sanders

not only a current politician
but a former actor
who played Rabbi Manny Shevitz

in the low-budget
(which is suitably populist)
1999 romantic comedy

"My X-Girlfriend’s Wedding Reception"

in which he condemned
the 1957 transfer

of the Brooklyn Dodgers
to Los Angeles

(a politically formative event
for the politician)

and a neighbor
giving out candy on Halloween

in another romcom

the 1988 film "Sweet Heart's Dance"

will be on Saturday Night Live tonight

and Bill Maher

who certainly does not do so
for everybody

has given him
the ringing endorsement

of "Fuck yeah."

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Wednesday, February 3, 2016

Help in Patience and Prayer

Should it be progressive

for President Obama
to visit a mosque in Baltimore

and then to tell the people there

"If you’re ever wondering
whether you fit in here

let me say it
as clearly as I can

as president of the United States.

You fit in here

right here”?

It doesn't matter

but the rest of the country
believing that they do

would certainly be progress.


This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.