Tuesday, October 24, 2017

Go Flake Yourself

Dear President Trump

One of your earliest Republican critics
Senator Jeff Flake of Arizona
today announced his retirement
in January of 2019

and true to his name
among a lot of other complete sentences

declared wimpily
 "These offices that we hold
are not ours to hold indefinitely"

and thesaurus-ly
"It is time for our complicity
and our accommodation
of the unacceptable to end"

and unabashedly others-consideringly
"I have children and grandchildren to answer to,
and so, Mr. President,
I will not be complicit"

and cowardly
"I rise today to say:

This poem © 2017 Emily Cooper.

Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Put A Corker In It

Dear President Trump

as insensitive as it was
for Mitt Romney
to offer a $10,000 bet

to Governor Rick Perry

(now your Energy Secretary

and happy to be so
once he knew the department
had to do with nukes)

at the 12th Republican debate
in Des Moines
back in 2011

at least Romney
had the $10,000 to spend

were he wrong about Perry's
prior support of health care mandates.

You want an IQ test

but we know
you would not do very well
because the way you responded

to Rex Tillerson
calling you a moron

or more accurately
a "fucking moron"

was not to respond
by doing something smart

(or at least the presidential equivalent
of coloring inside the lines

while your staff
closely supervises the crayon)

but to challenge him
to a numbers game

when we know
what you like to do with numbers

particularly small ones
that apply to you

like crowd sizes
and approval ratings.

This poem © 2017 Emily Cooper.

Tuesday, October 3, 2017

Viva Las Vegas

Just as how Barack Obama
as candidate and later president

both relaxed and built good PR
with a game of pick-up basketball

a genuinely loved hobby of his

in a visit today to the territory

President Trump built his PR with "PR"

when he

showing off
both his athletic prowess
and his penchant for entertaining the public

threw a pack of paper towels
into a crowd at a church.

Also in that adventure-packed day
he told the American citizens
that compared to Katrina
Hurricane Maria wasn't a "real catastrophe"

and that the severely-and-needlessly-delayed aid
(also known as a
perhaps Juggalo March-inspired "miracle")

was throwing the country's budget
"out of whack."

This trip follows yesterday
after the largest mass shooting
in US history. 

While Trump on Monday successfully read from a teleprompter
without giving in to the temptation
to ad-lib

(at least until today
when he found a home
for another ill-placed "miracle")

Sarah Huckabee Sanders
made clear there was no haste

to force the president
into a real role as unifier

and good-change-bringer
on gun control

calling it “premature to discuss policy"
(unless it's a travel ban
for Muslim-majority countries)

"when we don’t know all of the facts.”

Point taken

and besides
the American people already know
that no matter how the president speaks or acts

he is always ready to give away
his best golf trophies.

This poem © 2017 Emily Cooper.