Tuesday, May 29, 2018

Conners and Consequences

As difficult as it was
for people like Roseanne Barr

to maintain both a shred of dignity
and a positive impression
of our president

a new tweet comes in
at an ABC-dubbed
"abhorrent, repugnant"
new low

soon after the show's record highs
for the network.

Despite her prior tweets
wholeheartedly embracing some measure
of abhorrence and repugnance

ABC could rightfully not tolerate
her describing former Obama senior adviser
Valerie Jarrett

as a cross between Planet of the Apes
and Muslim Brotherhood

and had to cancel
her eponymous show.

Would that presidencies
could come to such swift
and decisive ends.

This poem © 2018 Emily Cooper.

Tuesday, May 22, 2018

Kim Jong-Uh

Apparently Trump
the master of deals
(presumably good ones)

is having second thoughts
on going to meet with Kim Jong-Un
in three weeks

and is presenting the ramifications
of being basically
completely unprepared

for perhaps the most final
of final exams

as a deliberate diplomatic move
rather than as a strategy
for buying more time

(if it can't be canceled)

to have his Cabinet
find him a map
showing where North Korea is

and maybe tell him
a sentence or two from Wikipedia
depending on
his attention span.

Says he
the genius who already knows
everything there is to know

and perhaps realizing
that even someone more knowledgeable than he

is at risk to damage
to his person
if a wrong move is made

"That doesn't mean
that it won't work out
over a period of time

but it may not work out
for June 12."

This poem © 2018 Emily Cooper.

Tuesday, May 15, 2018

Enhanced Morality Avoidance

With her 33 years of experience
in the CIA
Gina Haspel is a shining example

of a leader with experience

something so sorely needed
in the Trump administration

being a bad choice
for the country

namely due to her prior predilection
for "enhanced interrogation" techniques

which is right in line
with Trump's America

in which vague promises
to "probably do the right thing
yeah yeah sure"

before immediately retracting
any handshakes signifying a promise

will win you a spot
in the dear leader's circle

for as long as you are valuable
to his whims

which hopefully include
a passing glance
at something like "American values."

It is to be hoped
that if she is nominated

which now seems likely

she turns out to be a bozo
with a conscience

who can unequivocally denounce
past versions of herself
who would condone torture


This poem © 2018 Emily Cooper.

Tuesday, May 8, 2018

Iran So Far Away

Tuesday begins
with an apology
from Senator Orrin Hatch

to Senator John McCain
for suggesting it was "ridiculous"
for him to declare

that he wouldn't want President Trump
at his funeral

(who wouldn't want to be there anyway
as it probably contradicts
his belief system

of only attending funerals
of people who weren't captured

as well as his own
when the time comes)

and a non-apology
for plunging the US
into diplomatic crisis with Iran

and inexplicably severing
any even tenuous connection
that might be made

between "Trump"
and "peace in the Middle East."

Trump is also probably reveling
in his 2013 tweet

once-beloved Democrat Eric Schneiderman
"Wait and see
worse than Spitzer or Weiner"

and gloating in the fact
that he technically
has the upper hand

(or rather lower)

as he has not been called out
for engaging in the now-ex-New York Attorney General's
specific form of physical abuse.

This poem © 2018 Emily Cooper.

Tuesday, May 1, 2018

To Know That It's Raining

It doesn't take Scott Pruitt
(thank God)

to notice that Trump's forecast
remains Stormy

with a chance of revelation
of dark clouds hanging over Trump
and the legitimacy of his presidency

(for reasons other
than its sheer horribleness).

Chances of nuclear clouds
increase linearly based on the degree of ill-advisedneses
of Trump's tweets towards North Korea.

This poem © 2018 Emily Cooper.