UN-appreciated

Either Trump
is a master of dry humor

or the entire UN
(also known
as the rest of the world)

is laughing at him
not with him

when he says

"In less than two years
my administration has accomplished more

than almost any administration
in the history of our country"

to the people
who in fact
know his country's history

better than he does.




This poem © 2018 Emily Cooper.

Judge of Character

Former classmate Mark Judge

also known as the other person in the room
during the alleged attempted assault
of Christine Blasey Ford

has written a charming book
called Wasted: Tales of a GenX Drunk

detailing a misspent youth
at Georgetown Preparatory School

spent with a friend of his
“Bart O’Kavanaugh”

who for example
“passed out on his way back from a party”
and was seen puking
“in someone’s car the other night.”

Also tellingly
throughout the school's 1983 yearbook

are quotes like
"Do these guys beat their wives?"
and "Prep parties raise question of legality."

The photo of Judge himself is captioned
“Certain women should be struck regularly like gongs”
quoting Sir Noel Coward.

What Kavanaugh's defenders forget
is that even if events are misremembered by Ford
that what he did wasn't "so bad"
or there was no wrongdoing by him

is that
unlike many less privileged
or less male youth

he is neither being taken to prison
nor even being levied a hefty fine

but simply being considered
for whether or not he is fit
for a lifetime appointment.

And a note to harassers:

There is already one of yours
on the Supreme Court

and in the Oval Office.

This poem © 2018 Emily Cooper.

Hell No We Won't Flo

In case you forgot
just a reminder

that President Trump
will never treat any solemn anniversary
with the seriousness it deserves

nor find a way to take the spotlight off himself
when he does acknowledge it.

He instead started the day
with tweets about Russia

and praise of the currently morally dubious
Rudy Giuliani

and then later did a double fist pump
(not to be confused with the Obamas'
somehow Islamic terrorist-associated fist bump)

upon arriving
at a ceremony in Pennsylvania.

Looking to the near future
it is to be hoped
however fruitlessly

that Trump will finally use
one of his only superpowers
the power of misogyny

against a woman
who truly deserves it

Hurricane Florence.



This poem © 2018 Emily Cooper.

Fear and Misplaced Self-Loathing

In Bob Woodward's forthcoming book
entitled Fear

the author reports
a huge bombshell:

that Trump admits
he's made some mistakes.

According to the book
drawn from hundreds of hours of interviews
with firsthand participants and witnesses

or in other words
fact-based

his "biggest fucking mistake"

was condemning
white supremacists
after the 2017 rally

in Charlottesville

which is apparently what he calls
his unwitting follow-up speech

to his initial racist equivocation
of "both sides"

as being equally to blame
for the deadly conflict

and is how Trump
in his charmingly oddball way
arrives at an actual fact:

that despite the reactions
of sensible people

on the balance
he probably wasn't racist enough
for his base.



This poem © 2018 Emily Cooper.