Hate Me Five Times

Donald Trump
cannot contend with the fact
that American voters

would dare use
his "The Apprentice" catchphrase
"You're fired"
against him

even though
he wants just one "Trump was right" 
giant coronation bash

and does not want
to be president

nor with the feeling of embarrassment
at blaming his loss
on unprecedented conspiratorial actions

on their part. 

Said the candidate

"We're going to watch Pennsylvania.

Go down to certain areas
and watch and study

and make sure
other people don't come in
and vote five times."


This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Words Are Loaded Pistols

A US Secret Service official
has reported that "there has been
more than one conversation" 

with Donald Trump
since the candidate on Thursday

said at a rally
that maybe "the Second Amendment people"

could prevent Hillary Clinton from appointing
Supreme Court justices
who favor gun control.

Of course Trump denies
the meeting ever took place.

Said the former head of the CIA
retired Gen. Michael Hayden

"You're not just responsible
for what you say.

You are responsible
for what people hear."

But that won't help a candidate

whose brain hears everything he says
and turns it into

"I'm the greatest
so shut up."

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Unplanned Concession

Planned Parenthood
in its infinite wisdom

has conceived of
so to speak
another way to ruin America

in its launching
of the non-partisan campaign
"My Vote, My Voice"

to make voters
out of the people most affected
by voter suppression laws

and who are regularly
most in need of the services
that the organization provides

including youth
the poor
and people of color.

Volunteers in 45 states

will set up "action" tables
outside of Planned Parenthood health centers
and throughout these communities

where they will register voters

educate them
about their state's voter ID laws

and of course
remind them to vote
in November.

Unfortunately very few of these people
are likely to vote
for the Republican candidate

who wants to defund the organization.

(So unfair.)

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

What a Feminist Looks Like

President Obama
has written an essay

for Glamour magazine
explaining why he identifies

as a feminist.

He expresses gratitude
that his tenure as president

shortens his commute to "45 seconds"
and thus lets him spend
more time with his daughters.

He says that the experience of fatherhood
has allowed him to be

a direct witness
to the "enormous pressure girls are under
to look and behave
and even think a certain way"

even as they become successful

noting the particular challenges
faced by women of color
including his wife Michelle.

He concludes the essay
with the reminder
that "It's never been just about the Benjamins.
It's about the Tubmans too"

and that
"when everybody is equal
we are all more free."

Meanwhile Donald Trump
is on the sidelines

confident in his knowledge
that the key to solving sexual harassment
in the workplace

is for women to change jobs.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Sacrificial Voting

Though incomparable to those
of the Muslim solider Humayun Khan

who died in the act
of protecting the lives of his comrades
from a suicide car bomb

to be completely fair
to his own self-assessment

Donald Trump has made plenty of sacrifices

the most notable being
those traits of dignity
honor
grace and poise

as well as even
the loosest grasp on reality

or contrition in the face of wrongdoing
or dumbsaying.

This notable addition
to the pile

may even lead
to Trump voters

sacrificing their right
to make terrible decisions.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Give Love a Good Name

Hillary Clinton
is now officially

the Democratic nominee.

And one of the speakers
at the convention

was the Rev. Dr. William J. Barber, II

someone from this poet's home state
of North Carolina

who represented
the anti-HB2 antibodies

still coursing through the blood of the state

and who preached even
to the non-believers

an inclusive message of defibrillation.

"We must shock this nation
with the power of love.

We must shock this nation
with the power of mercy.

We must shock this nation
and fight for justice for all.

We can’t give up on
the heart of our democracy

not now
not ever!".


This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Trump Training

It's sadly too late
for the Trump Train

to make another stop
at Michelle Obama's Quotable Brilliance Depot

but she definitely
waved to the Republican candidate

as he passed.

She described how she and Barack

have instilled in their daughters
"that when someone is cruel

or acts like a bully
you don’t stoop to their level.

No our motto is
when they go low
we go high."

And still
without naming names

she slung her arrows
through the candidate's favorite platform
when she said

"The issues a president faces
are not black and white
and cannot be boiled down to 140 characters."

That would be a revelation

if only Donald Trump
ever took a single moment

to stop reveling in himself.


This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Notrump Contract

The bridge to our future.

Notrump.


This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

The Hill of Blights

Donald Trump's wife Melania's speech

may have been
meaning most definitely

was plagiarized from a 2008 speech
given by Michelle Obama

otherwise known
in GOP circles
as the six-foot-tall Satanic she-Devil

who wields a certain kind of power
even greater than her husband's

because in addition
to telling the truth about her own life in America
the good and the bad

she wears dresses
that show off her arms

and makes kids exercise
and eat their veggies.

And so yesterday Chris Christie

took it upon himself
to turn the tides away
from the incident

and to crowdsource the audience

by simulating a courtroom
in which he was the judge

and the attendees were the jury
judging Hillary Clinton "guilty"

for each of a series
of policy decisions

as though each were a crime

thus bringing to life
the wholly-original-to-the-GOP turn of phrase

"Lock her up!"

Well done Christie.

Sadly it might even be too original
for that oppressive set of ideals

called American democracy.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

The Un-Convention

On the eve
of the GOP convention

we know that the speaker list
consists of in part

Donald Trump's four children
and his wife Melania

professional golfer Natalie Gulbis

and former Calvin Klein underwear model
Antonio Sabato Jr.

The other presenters

meaning the ones
who have not yet declined the invitation

in large part
are uncharismatic
and more traditionally mean-spirited Congresspeople

who have nonetheless
been derided by Trump himself
in such a way

that even more left-leaning people
will feel a pang of sympathy for them.

Attendees can expect

that Trump will spend the first night

after years of investigations
giving them the definitive answer
on the Benghazi incident

then the second night
discussing everything Trump knows
about the economy

the third night
pressuring Vice Presidential nominee Mike Pence
to think of anything good to say about Trump

and the fourth night
embarrassing the openly gay Silicon Valley billionaire
Peter Thiel

by making him speak
to a party adopting homophobia and transphobia

as one of the planks
on their platform.

There will also be a presentation

detailing former President Bill Clinton's
sexual misconduct

about which of course
nothing has ever been said.

And no one

not the celebrities
not the politicians

not the delegates
not the family relations

and probably
not even the guest of honor

will really
want to be there.


This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Trumper Sticker

Donald Trump
has made an offer

for the role of Vice President

to Indiana Governor Mike Pence.

And together

as this poet hopes
will appear
on the inevitable bumper sticker

these two candidates

will Trump any semblance
of Pence-iveness in government.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Trumped by His Own Petard

In 2008
on Donald Trump's syndicated minute-long
radio show feature "Trumped!"

for which he gave his opinions

against tattoos

in favor of Michael Jackson's innocence

and critical of Saudi Arabian
easy divorce laws
and female pop stars getting married

for example

he said "At least one member
of [Mr. Obama’s] team
said Clinton would make a good vice president.

Well I know her
and she’d make a good president
or a good vice president.”

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Not Even Fox-Worthy

To borrow from Jeff Foxworthy
of Blue Collar Comedy

if after a yearlong pointlessly incendiary
and somehow increasingly unhinged
and ignorant campaign

you stroll into Congress

for a meet-and-greet
with Republicans

get asked about protecting Article I
of the Constitution

and respond by listing numbers
until you name the non-existent
"Article XII"

tell the other Arizona senator Jeff Flake
who was not taken
as a POW

and is unwilling to support you
because of your comments
about a Hispanic judge

and is actually not up
for re-election

that you will make sure
the senator loses his election bid

and call absent senator
Mark Kirk a "loser"

you might be Donald Trump.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Recommit to Freedom

Happy belated birthday

to oldest Obama daughter Malia

who yesterday turned 18

and celebrated her independence

along with that of the country
over which
her father presides

though likely shortly into the festivities
Malia undoubtedly realized
she was more mature

than much of Congress.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Conspiring to Defeat Justice

Goodbye to Holocaust survivor
and Nobel Laureate

Elie Wiesel

who has died
at age 87.

And Donald Trump
has unfortunately backpedaled

on this lovely coincidental commemoration

that occurred
when he Tweeted an image

featuring Hillary Clinton's head
overlaying a pile of money

with the words
"Most Corrupt Candidate Ever"
written on a Star of David

then quickly replacing it
with a circle.

Trump has obviously chosen to forget

that the presidential race's
one actually Jewish candidate

would rather break apart the banks.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Odd Future

President Obama's summit
with Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau

and Mexican President Enrique Pena Nieto

in Ottawa

is going way better
than Donald Trump's Scottish adventure

despite his having zero hotels
or golf courses
licensed with his name.

One such example
occurred when the Canadian Parliament
today broke into chants

of "Four more years"

after Obama completed the first speech
given by a United States leader in Canada
since 1995.

Donald Trump may note
that Canada has its own leaders

that everyone there was aware
that Obama cannot
legally run for President again

and yet were expressing the hope

that he were able
to do so.

So it will take
some special creativity

to make this event
into a video
from 2025

after two successful Trump terms
come to a close.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

A Trite Con Man

While on the papal plane
returning from Armenia

after having gone off-script
and used the word "genocide"

to describe the mass murder
that took place
in the early 20th century

Pope Francis also chose to come out

as the first one
to denounce Christians' treatment

of gay people

and saying they should apologize.

"The Church must ask forgiveness
for not behaving many times.

When I say the Church
I mean Christians.

The Church is holy.
We are sinners."

He added

"It has to ask forgiveness
for having blessed many weapons."

Of course
it can be assumed
the Republican presidential candidate

who is severely in need of forgiveness
will continue to deliberately refuse it

and furthermore
will continue to believe

that everyone else should apologize
for perceiving his blessings as weapons.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Highly Debatable

Sharing his opinion
of the Republican response
to gun violence

as exemplified
by their actions

following the 24-hour sit-in
staged by House Democrats

to secure a vote
on gun control measures

otherwise known as nothing

White House Press Secretary John Earnest said

"Cowards are people
who talk tough

in the hope
they will not be asked
to actually act."

And meanwhile the Republican candidate
has proven just how slow

of a learner he is

when in an NBC interview

when asked if he was ready
to debate Hillary Clinton

he said "I think my whole life
has been in preparation frankly."

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.

Anger Management

With only a month to go
before the Republican National Convention

Donald Trump has just fired
his campaign manager

Corey Lewandowski

in an effort to bolster
his campaign

which has been plummeting continuously
toward an as-yet-unknown nadir

with Lewandowski
the dangling Band-Aid

over the gaping wound
called his mouth.

And really
any decision that is bad for Trump
is good for the country

so we should all applaud
his unconscious act of patriotism.

This poem © 2016 Emily Cooper.