But Not for G(OP)

(Apologies to George Gershwin)

O's got his bills of health
but not for me

gives blacks
Latinos wealth
and takes from me.

With O' to lead the way
I'm bound like Shades of Grey

more than those Russian gays
do publicly.

It all began so well
but what an end

This is the time
rich fellas need a friend.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

A New Theism

A couple of English
stand-up comedians
Sanderson Jones
and Pippa Evans
are the founders
of Sunday Assembly

a "godless congregation"
for atheists
both mainline and devout.

Right now
there are 5 churches total
3 in Britain
1 in Australia
and 1 in New York City

but they are embarking
on an 18-city worldwide tour
so watch out.

The founder of the
new Los Angeles chapter
Ian Dodd says:

"What we're trying to do
is hold on to the bath water
while throwing out the baby Jesus."

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

The Big Red Button

This poet has lived
the self-aware
part of her life
with Macs and/or PCs

so she knows a bit
how they function but

if it don't work
the way you want
sometimes you still gotta push
the button
and shut 'er down.

So yeah GOP

fingers crossed
the Tea Party
is so tired
through it all

they don't realize the box
still did a few useful things
when it was on.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Dance to the Nye-est Star

Thank you Bill Nye
the Science Guy

for filling this poet's
young brain

(and those
of other future
liberal arts English majors)

with entertaining
but never dumbed-down
science facts.

Geology meterology
chemistry biology archaeology
(thankfully no Scientology).

And also
for having
the second-most-funky
theme song on TV
(next to Fresh Prince's).

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

These Dreams

(A few apologies to Heart for borrowing a title)

This poet sees
that these dreams
require intervals of work
followed by intervals of rest

but it's hard to dream alone
so invite your friends

and don't get too angry
if they bring along
their own dreams.

This poet will try
to follow that advice.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Walk Like the Bee Gees

If Egypt
had an anthem

that
when sung
did just
what it said

This poet would go with
stayin' alive
stayin' alive

walkin'
talkin'
not kicked around
anymore.

It's alright
it's okay
live to see another day
(and lots lots more)
understandin'.

Something about
the New York Times.

Brothers.
Mothers.

Stayin' alive
stayin' alive.

In fact this poet
would vote
for mis-remembered
Bee Gees tunes
to become anthems
the world over.

Maybe it'll work?

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Pre-Despotition

(Apologies to the King of Rock 'n' Roll)

Wise chuvak say
"Be gay or Russian."
But they can't help
falling in love with Pu'.

"Let us stay"
Would that be a sin

if they can't help
falling in love with Pu'?

Like the Volga flows
to the Caspian Sea
they'll wave rainbow flags
and beg
"Pu' look at me."

Fly-fishing or thrown
from hang gliders down to sea
Harley
horse or piano
"Vladimir's so fine to me."

Take your soft iron hands
and tell gays what to do

for they can't help
falling in love with Pu'.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Old-Fashioned Notions

Republicans breaking vows
they never
meant to keep

Federal spying
democracies rising
and falling
and fledgling

this fussing over royal babies
can all leave you
sighing
and wondering

what has love got to do
got to do with it?

Tina Turner
married Erwin Bach.

There's a phrase that fits.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Her Majesty's Labour

Until further notice
all humans when born

either emerge
from vaginas
or are cut out of people
with vaginas
(vaginae
if we're being technical).

So
to clarify

a poor woman
can still give birth

and though the world
may not
be watching

it happens.

A rich man
cannot.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

G.O. Family

(Apologies to Wendy Davis and Sister Sledge)

Li'l Texan Wendy
Why sis'
you diss GOP?

Li'l single Wendy
let us be
your wedding ring.

Everyone knows they go together
pro-life and human rights.

(Why)
do we ignore when guns
shoot whoever?
We won't tell no lie

all those lib'rals
lapsed right-wingers
say "Can they be that close?"
Just let us state for the record

we'll decide which rights matter most.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Snowd-In

We regret to inform you
that we have not
as of yet
decided what to call
Edward Snowden's leaks
of the United States'
mass surveillance programs.

Tragically
we wasted
"Snowmageddon"
on that stupid blizzard
earlier this year.

Rest assured
you will be
immediately informed
when that decision is made.

Signed
the Media.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Why'd They Change It

(Apologies to Jimmy Kennedy and Nat Simon)

Istanbul or Constantinople
Call it Istanbul
not Constantinople
If you feel wronged in Constantinople
get in a Turkish fight on a moonlit night

Every one in Constantinople
lives in Istanbul
not Constantinople
so if you want change in Constantinople
go and protest in Istanbul

In Mumbai
New York
Iran and Birmingham
reasons change
but we can say
"People just want it
better some way."

So go on back to Constantinople
but please be careful
in Constantinople
around the world
not just Constantinople
"Why do these police all act like jerks?"
That's nobody's business but ...

Abdullah's.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Monday, Monday Raise Up

(With apologies to the Mamas and the Papas and Native NC Rapper Petey Pablo)

Moral Monday
good ol' NC
Moral Monday
means a chance for democracy
Voting rights
community freedom we are guaranteed
Next Moral Monday
won't you please stand here with me.

This one's for...
North Carolina
come on and
raise up.

North Carolina
come on and
raise up.

This one's for who?
Us
Us
Us.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Rescue Me (Ode to OK Senator Tom Coburn)

(With apologies to Fontella Bass)

Rescue me
Tom take me in your arms

rescue me
from this godawful storm

if my food stamps
make you blue

take those too
hope that will do

Come on and rescue me

Come on Tommy
and rescue me
Come on Tommy
and rescue me

'cause I need you by my side
then feel free to ignore me.

Rescue me
I'll close my greedy hands

get a third job
I know I can

Tom I love you
Tom I want you
then feel free to ignore me.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Stealing Home

Welcome back
Amanda
Gina
and Michelle.

Women
and girls
boys
and men

they want to be
free.

Maybe that means

people everywhere
just want
to go home.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Update Cycle

What's breaking news to one
may be another's
ancient history.

Good night
not goodbye

they say on TV
(or used to anyway)

because there will
surely be more
news tomorrow.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

On The Ground

A female soldier
pleaded guilty
to two counts of desertion
after fleeing to Canada
in 2007 
to avoid a second tour
of duty in Iraq

the desert.

She said she had become
"disillusioned"

but Canada's not sure
whether to give
her a home
because for this war

(unlike that little one
in the 60s)

she decided to enlist
voluntarily

which of course
is true.

Right?

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Democracy Will Hear You Now

Wait your turn
nervous half-listening
rehearsing
They see you
whoops not yet... Okay go now
you speak they listen.

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Between Us And Them

Detectives discovered
a rusted piece of landing gear
wedged between
an apartment building
and a mosque

and believed to be a remnant
of one of the hijacked planes
from
September 11 2001.

Back then this country
had lots of questions

like who did this
and why

all of which
needed to be asked but

the first question to answer

was and is "Who do we
want to be?"

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.

Left To Their Own Devices

The House Intelligence Committee reported
that the two bombs
at the Boston marathon
were detonated with a remote control
for toy cars.

Life is but a video game?

This poem © 2013 Emily Cooper.