Pope Francis became the first Pontiff
to first of all
declare the Internet
"a gift from God"
and secondly
hold a Google Hangouts video chat
with special-needs kids.
He will be addressing Congress
in September
during his first visit
to the US.
Today Obama
met the Dalai Lama
and though was advised
not to talk with him
nonetheless praised him
and greeted him
with a bow-like gesture.
Meanwhile in North Carolina
Republican Senator Thom Tillis
is seeking to deregulate hand-washing
ostensibly so that private businesses
don't have to live with the pressure
of following regulations
that ensure consumer safety
(but probably also because
he doesn't mind
if passers-by catch a whiff
of his own
private business
to hearken them back
to the days
when most ailments
were solved with whiskey
because Big Science
hadn't cured cholera yet)
meaning that to ensure
the Pope doesn't get sick
he'll either
have to greet him
with a Communist bow
or a scientifically-proven
more-sanitary
Muslim fist bump.
It's a circuitous route
to bipartisan-ism
but one we should all applaud
with our defiantly unwashed
disease-carrying
and furthermore
uncompromisingly American hands.
This poem © 2015 Emily Cooper.
