Researchers in the UK
have some bad news
for the parents of babies
with flat-topped heads
a phenomenon that has increased
in recent years
(due to that weirdly
commonplace paranoia
of hoping they will
not die suddenly
during the night
because they weren't
sleeping on their backs)
which is that
costly "helmet therapy"
will probably not help them
so luckily
you can still treat
their malformation
with noninvasive physical therapy
but not before
your next get-together
so that useless baby
can pull its ever-increasing weight
by crawling around
and serving your guests
from a small tray
of hors d'oeurves
balanced on its head.
This poem © 2014 Emily Cooper.
